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You should be with a guy who loves you more than you do!!!

With all the drama that has been going on lately, I couldn’t hold my self from posting this.A just got engaged recently, we were so happy for her, she is a good girl and deserves the best, she hugged me and said: “make sure when you decide to get married to be with someone who loves you more than you do”

I didn’t make a comment on that statement but in my head I was like what on earth is she talking about???

You should be with a guy who loves you more than you do How true is that statement?

Later on, I had a discussion with N about what A told me on the pharmacy, and simply her reaction was “of course, any girl should marry a guy who loves her more than she does, she is totally right, the smartest thing to do, you should do that too”…

 Ahhh, Hellooooo…  is it me or all of this is nonsense?

-But N, things don’t go like that, I mean it goes both ways, this is a relationship not a race!!

-Mai, I’m telling you, listen to me, believe me it’s the right thing to do, if you want to be happy be with some one who loves you more than you do, if you love him more than he does, he will take advantage of it and step over you.

_Oh my god, what are talking about? Am I going to war or something? Step over me, and take advantage of it, this is suppose to be the person I love.

Seriously now, if girls think that way, that means that guys also look for a girl who love them more than they do right? So it goes both ways.

Aren’t relationships in general not only love and marriage about balance? Both parties work on making this relationship as good as they can, they communicate, agree, disagree, and forgive each other.

When you say that he loves you more than you do, what do you actually mean by that? Does it give you the ability to leave that person hen you don’t feel like it any more? Or does it mean that you actually hurt that person without any feeling of guilt? Or you do what ever you think regardless what he thinks? And most importantly, what kind of relationship is this…

Sometimes I feel like I’m from another planet when I hear this stupidity, am I normal or people are going crazy around me, I was the only one who was surprised by that fact, everyone around me were agreeing with A and N!!! Duh

I don’t know, I really don’t know

Filed under: Thoughts

25 Responses

  1. hamede says:

    I do not agree with A and N.

  2. nido says:

    Believe it or not, It’s kind of true and not stupid!! I disagree with the specific words N or A have used, It’s not a war or anything like that. My best friend got married before me, and she told me the same. her explanation was simple! when you love someone who loves you more, he does his best to win all your heart, and when this happens, it’s the right time for marriage. After marriage a female will start to love the male more, and this is when balance occurs! because a female becomes attached more to the male, physicaly not only emotionaly! you see what I mean. I didn’t get it when she told me, but now both our experiences proves its true:) its not that i didnt love him at all…I loved him so much, and now it’s even more! el hamdillah:)

  3. hamede says:

    Nido,my wife loved me more than i did,now we love each other more and more,what you say about that.

  4. afaf says:

    does that mean u have to put a limit to ur love!!!!…love grows by time between the couple, i tend to believe, so who says u should wait till his love is ahead of urs then go and love him more…it is no race and it is 3eshra at the end of the day… in the old days, they used to fight who loves the other more…not less….!! weird how life changes quickly….
    follow ur heart dear and never put a limit or taboos on ur love….
    with all respect to what they said, but u r not crazy or alone in this….

  5. nido says:

    I’m not generalizing here, I just talked about my own experience, and Im not saying it’s the ONLY RIGHT kind of realtionships…it just happenes:) It’s not that you should plan it by looking for someone who loves you more or less, and of course its not a race, but when it happens and you are with the right one, your love will increase, akeed! and the balance occurs!

  6. The issue is like this
    It’s a power struggle, and someone needs to win. If the man loves more, he becomes the house resident mop (ممسحة)

  7. Qabbani says:

    how u can tell if He love her more ?
    how can He know that she Love him more or less?

    come on i cant find it rational, how could u really know that he’s love u more than u do ?!

    and its kind of GIRLS talk to me… looking for something like HE MUST DO THE BEST AND BEST TO WIN ME LOVE ME MORE : “Lesh yamma !!!” ooh yeah cuz ur something precious unique no body like u in the whol world , he should die to take u and show u ALL love just to say I DO ———– >

    YEAH this is the kind of GIRL that i will never LOVE

    take one who LOVE u more than u love him , okay i will never ever think to talk girl i love her more … i believe that Female can give more love most of time than man Do…

    “Love end with marriage ” : why they keep say that !! yes cuz love after marriage is something else diff kind …

    if all Girls talk like this , “i will not take a MAN unless he love me more thani do ” LOL it’s there problem unless if she good lier and make him she do love him same as he ….

    LOVE is not just a feel i can increase it make more less or even compare in some how … when HE love her and SHE love him and Both Love each other and want to be together the rest of life .. no matter who love the other more …

    This is personal thought , please No offense if there any …

  8. Manal says:

    i should comment on this..but later on

  9. kinzi says:

    I disagree with A & N, because I think a relationship has to be built on trust and mutual respect as well as that wonderful ‘love rush’ . I think Nido’s comment may have a cultural angle, since many Arab style relationships start with engagement and love is a choice that follows, the guy actually chooses the girl out of the line-up of available girls…which must be quite a rush for a young heart! It is a different order of things than I am used to, but it seems to work fine if the man and wife are honorable people. If they are pretending and hiding, then it is a recipe for disaster.

  10. summer says:

    All i know is that there are no limits to love…in my personal life, some days i feel that i love my husband more than he does and the opposite is true!! Depending on the mood of the day or the period we are going through in our daily life.
    In relationships or marriage, the man is not the one to make the choice to be committed to the woman, the woman has a say in it too. Beyond the physical attraction and the chemistry, there is a lot more than that…love is a tangible thing and really cannot be measured by any unit, besides there are a lot more to life than love only, many factors play a huge part in deciding “how much” we love and “how” we go about this love!

  11. Manal says:

    this was a topic for discussion many times with my friends even in my mind..when we love someone isn’t that something natural..or can we just stop that when we know how much the other part love us? i think it is no use to live with someone you don’t love with all your heart even if he don’t love you to the same level or with the same measures..yaani i think you become happy when you feel beloved..but happier when you love more..

  12. VA says:

    I believe Love is a choice! Does not depend on the other person. All the love we feel comes from within the individual not from the other person. Loving someone when they don’t deserve it, giving others freedom to love or not love you back is true love. Do we respond to what others say and do? Absolutely! But we still have a choice, to respond with love, in loving ways, even if it means loving enough to let go. Trust, honesty, respect, are the most important. Love can grow, or wither away and die. The choices both people make daily are what determine the fate!

  13. koki says:

    i thing my problem is the biggest i love someone so much and he does too even somtimes i feel he loves me more .the problem is that another guy proposed and he loves me like hill even without talking to me hes 27 and my parents wants me to get married to him they thing that his age , money,manners are very suitable and very enough to let me love him ,although i fight alot with the one i love and my parents doesnt agree of the idea making him my future husband becauce he still 20 and still studing but, i cant imagine being with someone else and making him my future husband ,come on how it will go on in our marrige at bed i think its impossiple plz say your comments help me if someone thinks that marring the one i love is not in my benefit tell me ,and do you think that i will loss this man who proposed plz put in mind that he is one of richest families in my country and he seems polite .

  14. koki says:

    by the way i live in canada and am 21

  15. posi says:

    i want to tell that love is such a hill and it hurts so why get hurt live your life and listen to your parents,and tell me from wich country you r koki

  16. koki says:

    hi possi thanks for your advice but sorry i really disagree with you i will never be with someone i dont like i think i will leave it to disteny , am from sudan and i live in canada hellooooooooooow i need more comments

  17. Maioush says:

    Ok Ok Koki…
    I’m not a relationships expert, but I think that it matters that you love the guy as much as he loves you, so what??? The guy is an a perfect age, and has the money, and all the other things that matters to YOUR parents, but what about u?? you are so young, and you have so much time to meet great people, you are in love already, it’s ok for you guys to fight, that’s a healthy relationship, normal people fight ALL THE TIME!! Both of you guys are so young, you don’t have enough experience in life, believe me, when I was you age, I went through the same thing, and I’m so glad I said no, I’m glad I waited, I’m more mature now, I know what I want, and I can be in a very healthy relationship as well, so take it easy and think before you make up your mind, good luck

  18. posi says:

    good for you disteny is above every thing i thing you are agood girl and faithful that why ur confused ,you seem that you love ur parent and listen to them at the sametime ur faithful to ur lover .but dont keep it up cauz good people always get disappoited and get hurt

  19. haysam says:

    listen girl sometimes you think the one you love is the best ,but after you live with another person and share life ull find it easy and you will flow with life dont be afraid and we r in money world

  20. koki says:

    oh my god i guess its a little scary and abit advanture caz am not sure to flow with life and forget anything behind me ,but still am not covienced. but any ways thanx alot for sharing your comment . plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz people more comment i feel am gonna get crazy

  21. nashwa says:

    koki take it easy girl am married to aman which we didnt have aprevious relationship and here our life is ok its going on well takeit easy and have faith in your parents

  22. wagdi says:

    oooooooooooooh you seem to small listen ill tell you somthing if its ur disteny to marry me so you will even if we dont know each other but see you never know whose mr right . thats because guys are moody and abit selfish but i think you will never know whats coinmg tommorow so take it easy and i dont think that it the biggest problem ever ,my wife had afiance before me getting marring her and she feels that she loves me more and she really hates o think about the past while she thought that they will get married but now what she is with me . cheer up u seem a good girl from inside because you care for you r parents and people around you . i think you deserve better than those ppl even

  23. Casey says:

    When I read this, I totally disagreed with A and N, then I thought about my own relationship. I really care about my partner, but I know that he really loves me. With this knowledge, I find myself growing closer to him everyday, and so I think its just the sense of security knowing just how much someone cares for you. However, I think it would make it easier to walk away.

  24. alex says:

    i wish my ex girlfriend knew this…see i loved her more than she loved me…u wanna know how i know that?? she told me when she broke up with me…she said “sorry but u love me more than i could ever love you…” she said it isnt fair to pretend to love me as much as i love her…not fair!? not fair is leaving me alone with nothing but an empty space in my chest thats not fair! now shes havin fun with her friends and im all alone sad all the time.

    only problem now is i still love her and shes way over me…im lost and i dont know what to do. =(

  25. noha tawfik says:

    its Illogical to think that way !!!! how selfish the person who think this way should love your lover the same not less but you can love him more.
    do your best to success with your relation .give him all his rights (limited) so if you leave him a day not to think about you bad way , not to find that you wouldnt deserve him and to satisfy yourself . if there is fight between both of you dont ever think you’re faillure or it wont work its veery very healthy . but always treat this problems dont let it go .if you let it go it will go but not completly gone its just hidden and it will happen again but it will be biger than you can imagin so you have to treat it reguallary .



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